Like a knife in my back you don’t reply to the words
I send you, why is it that you refuse to let me know
How you are, what you are doing, who you are with
Who are you with? Don’t decree shit to me. Just leave me
With these splints and messy hair unshaven like a dog
Mauling a packet of yoyo biscuits. I am hopeless in your eyes
Aren’t I? What hope have I got when you don’t wanna know
Who I am or what I’ve been through you should want to?
But then again you shouldn’t because without you I am shit
And I smell like shit, I don’t give a shit. Where are you?
What dogs prey on you in the hot afternoon?
Are there bees around you?
Do they buzz fast or hover slowly round the flower of your body,
Like I love to – take your flower, fuck it, pick off the petals one by one,
Throw them, toss them (I love it when you toss me), dismember your being.
I remember when you ached for my touch, my tongue, my voice
To caress you inner thoughts and demons
and whisper to you
While you were dreaming about the future. Just to hear your voice
On the phone and protect me, while I’m in my chambers, colluding with oblivion.